Sunday, February 13, 2005

When Haiku Goes Bad

What the hell is Haiku? - I hear you cry. Peasent.

Haiku is one form of traditional japanese poetry characterised (nowdays) by a 17-syllable verse form consisting of three metrical units of 5, 7, and 5 syllables. Thear are a few other "rules" too.
  1. Haiku is "truer to reality" if there is no "center of interest in it".
  2. There is great importance of the poet's first impression, just as it was, of subjects that are taken from daily life, and importance in local colour (which creates freshness).
With this in mind, and not being able to find anything nice to write about, I thought I'd have a go. Bollocks to the rules. They were probably made to be broken. Sod em if they can't take a joke, serves em right for hunting whales. Here goes:

When Haiku Goes Bad
  • Eiderdown gliding,
    Fanatic movement underneath,
    Constant quest for bread.

  • Bloody fire wont light,
    Freezing sodding cold again,
    Put on extra socks.

  • Overdraft again,
    How does it mount up so much,
    Beans for tea I guess.

  • Stupid damn rabbit,
    Nose twitching in uncleaned hutch,
    Make better pies than pets.

  • Think back to the acid,
    Did I get tracers before,
    What was I on about?

That's all. I'm probably doing it wrong and I'm bored now. I wonder if www.evilheiku.com is an available domain? Or maybe www.maoningaboutshitusingpoetrythatdoesntryme.org.uk? I don't know why I bother.

I need cheese on toast. Back away from the cooker.

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